In the little things

It's really all in the little things. Little things like turning on worship music at the beginning of the day, whether you are truly worshiping or just going about your routine it changes your mood and the atmosphere of your home, and once I turn it on, I can't help but sit down or lift my hands and praise my God.

It's the little things like when I turn on the worship music and suddenly my daughter is by my side swaying back and forth singing. Melts my heart every time, I am finding when I turn on the music my little guy inside starts to kick, and I can't help but wonder what's really going on inside of me. I don't believe a child is ever to young to know the presence of God or to worship.

It's that one small moment you give in to Jesus and feel Him for the first time in days, the love and overwhelming presence. Why do I wait? Why do I not start every morning like this? Why is God so good to us that we can get "busy" and ignore Him for days, weeks, months, or even years, but He is right there when we silence ourselves?

I can't help but love Him more all the time for how wonderful He is. Every situation in my life where I have felt overwhelmed, stressed, like everything was impossible, and I just wanted to throw in the towel and give up on God, on life, everything, He has still provided whether I ask Him to or not, whether I am really intimate with Him or not. It doesn't matter what we give Him He is still there for us, and that is so hard to understand.

I can't even begin to recount all God has done for me. The times I have literally threatened to end my own life as a child unless God came thru, He did. The times where we didn't think we had money for food in the past and yet we always had enough, the times we didn't think we could pay our bills and yet somehow we have each time. Thinking I could never provide for our daughter and all the people who have given me clothes, and things we needed, a crib, stroller, everything. Now with our son, I haven't been freaking out about provision knowing God will take care of us, and just yesterday a girl I hardly know offered me all her baby boy things. I am beyond blessed, and one day I cannot wait to be able to give like others have given to me. I am forever grateful to so many people.

I may not spend hours a day seeking out God like I once did, I may not have a perfect walk with Him, yet He is still faithful. He is in all we do, He is in our work, in our everyday life, in our children, and everyday I am learning how much He is by my side, and how much I am learning thru this season even if it isn't like it used to be. He is so good to me! I give Him all the praise for everything in my life, in the pain there is beauty, because God can turn everything to good. I truly believe everything can turn to good no matter how awful it is.